Thursday, August 27, 2009

We Closed, and We're Moving.

Finally. I'm sick of talking, writing, or thinking about it.

I have to get back to moving, but you must see this in the meantime. Hearty chuckles all around.

"Designed specifically for women" because men have no need whatsoever!

"Hey girls! I know how you can get paid to exercise! Send me $19.95 and I'll tell you!"

Feel free to add.

Friday, August 21, 2009

It Must Be Said

I'm going to admit something that is probably pure heresy to children of the '80s.

I hate Pee Wee Herman.

Even as a child, I detested him. I wouldn't watch his show, I wouldn't watch his movies, I just couldn't stand him. There is nothing about him I found even remotely funny, and I'm not anxious to suffer through a retro resurgence, which I fear is coming. My 14 year old sister sent me a Pee Wee Herman link and asked if I remembered him from way back when.

Updated: New Topic:

I yelled at the girl at our mortgage company. I told her if we did not have documents today, then I wasn't signing at all. And I mean it. I told her two months of her life will have been wasted if we do not have docs today. I realize they're now at the mercy of the lender, but I don't care. If they don't have the clout to get those docs from the lender, then I am not closing. I will rent a house and buy something else using a competent mortgage brokerage firm. They will not get their fee, and I will spread the news of their incompetence far and wide (which actually I'm already doing).

To go into the details of how incompetent they are would take a very long time and might make a useful artery of mine explode. One of the more minor details was misspelling my name, and putting the wrong address on the initial docs. You can extrapolate from there.

Which brings me to just how stupid Jethro and I are. Especially me. I knew better than to use someone we knew nothing about. I knew better. I worked in real estate for years and have seen firsthand how people get fucked by mortgage companies they use because a friend works there, or they were promised something fantastic and unreal.

Jethro and I used this guy because he was part of Jethro's business network. We felt a certain sense of obligation and took a risk. Any amount of critical thinking on my part and I would have never taken that chance, but I have this bizarre altruistic tendency that rears its ugly head every so often, and I will find myself concerned with someone else at my own expense.

And it really was altruistic. Referrals from this douche weren't nearly as important as actually closing on a house, and we knew it. But the guy was new to the group, and seemed nice (probably is nice) and eager to work. The clinic was doing really well and we thought we'd spread the wealth around.

Such a bad, stupid, moronic thing to do. And I really did know better. I don't like learning lessons and I hate learning them the hard way. But what I hate most of all is learning lessons that I've already learned the hard way.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Typical Life

I don't want to post depressing things, but that's part of what's going on, and it's part of life.

First, we simply can't close on a house. Our loan hasn't been rejected, but neither is it fully approved. We've been in this limbo for months now. And we have to be out of the house by the end of the month. I don't really know what to do.

The 2nd anniversary of Charles' death/murder was on the 12th. Our friends in Houston went out to commemorate and the evening was hosted by one of Charles' former roommates. I'll call him Cade. He was a wild guy and I have a few funny stories about him, but he is, from what I can tell, nearing the end stages of Lou Gehrig's disease. I suppose it was bittersweet. He wouldn't talk to anyone after his initial diagnosis except Charles. I know people would have been there for him, but I have no doubt he didn't want to be slobbered over. I remember Charles telling me about it and saying that Cade would want people to remember him in better times. I know I would.

But Cade came out of his self-inflicted exile to remember his friend. A whole lot of dust gets in my eyes when I think about it. I saw the pictures. He looks not good, and I can understand someone with any amount of pride refusing to be seen in that condition. But he came out for his friend. I hope death might not seem as frightening to him with someone like Charles waiting at the end. I'm just sad that it was Charles who had to pave the way.

Anyway, it's too misery-inducing to write much more about it.

I'm trying to think of something more cheerful.

Jethro and I got drinks with a former blogger who is somewhat local to us last weekend. It was fun. I felt like getting my drink on, and I did. The $3.00 jack 'n' cokes at the local Coyote Ugly did their part. There were some hot chicks dancing on the bar too. They were neat looking. But there is the ugliest trend occurring. Tube socks with cowboy boots. I saw two girls wearing them, and it was not cute. You have to have one hot little ass to pull off that kind of ugly, and I'll give them some credit there.

Anyway, it was a fun night.

And I'm losing weight again, I'm happy to report. I can't believe I went on a diet at such a stressful time since food gives me such joy and happiness, but Jethro says if I can withstand it through this stress, it shouldn't be so hard when all the stress is over. I see his point. And the healthy eating is probably helping to keep the stress from killing me. And an even bigger plus, I've experimented with some new recipes and they're freaking delicious. And healthy. For example. Shepherd's Pie. I love, love, love shepherd's pie. But it's pretty fattening and full of bad bad carbs from the potatoes. This recipe was different. The South Beach diet calls for cauliflower to be used instead of the mashed potatoes, but I don't really care for cauliflower no matter how much sour cream you use, so I used Great Northern White Beans instead. I heated them up, put in two (heaping) spoons of sour cream and an egg yolk, then fluffed them up with a mixer. I had no idea how they would turn out, but they were really good. Very similar to potatoes, but healthier apparently. For the ground beef mixture, I sauteed onions and garlic in a wee little bit of olive oil, then added the ground beef. When that was browned, I added two cups of edamame instead of peas (which have a lot of sugar), added two table spoons of balsamic vinegar in lieu of Worcestershire sauce which has sugar in it, one can of beef broth (that was too much) and let it simmer awhile. Then I put it in a casserole dish and spread the mashed beans over it. Then I covered the top with low fat shredded cheddar and baked it for 25 minutes. It turned out really well. The only problem was that there was a lot of liquid from using too much broth. I'll just reduce that amount next time.

So big problems are always there, but the little things are good.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

I started massage therapy classes. I don't want to go into the whys and wherefores, but suffice it to say I have good reasons. Unfortunately, they're very boring. The hands-on part is okay - you get a massage each class - but the anatomy and physiology class is going to kill me. I don't care about any of it. It consists of the instructor (who is actually pretty cute) reading the textbook and then getting tested. The highlight of the class is reading ahead waiting for the cute instructor to say 'vagina.' What? You all know I'm not right.

And we're still waiting to close on the next house. I'm afraid. I don't know what is going on and I don't want to talk about it.

So I'm just going to watch lions eat a antelope calf on Animal Planet. I think that will have a calming effect.