Sunday, March 21, 2010

Embracing the Suck

I'm not going to lie. I hope this healthcare bill passes. I'm ready to embrace the suck just for the pure, evil pleasure of reveling in the agony of the blighted morons who voted for Obama, and the lazy-eyed douchebags who stayed home because McCain wasn't "conservative" enough. I'm going to enjoy watching your suffering, and you will suffer.

In a loosely structured order, here's what's going to happen:

1.) Nothing. For 8 years, nothing at all is going to happen, at least not in terms of tangible benefits. That's because the government is going to tax you like you've never dreamed, in ways you have never dreamed, before anyone will receive any benefit at all.

2.) In the meantime, the cost of private insurance will rise dramatically. If insurance companies are going to be forced to cover those with pre-existing conditions, you will pay mightily. Then you're going to waste all kinds of time trying to get government coverage that doesn't even exist. Then the feelings of dread will set in when you realize how utterly fucked you are.

3.) This monstrosity cannot be funded no matter how much they tax. The profits of every insurance company, including bonuses for their bigshots will fund this massive abortion of a plan for about 30 seconds. And if there are no profits, there are no insurance companies. So after paying exorbitantly for years, say good-bye to your private insurance. And in an economy that will continue to  suffer, don't look to other businesses to take on the burden.  And if there are no businesses to tax, say good-bye to the government plan. Get ready to be taxed for nothing, and then to pay out of pocket for your medical care.

4.) You will never qualify for the government plan. If they decide you can afford private insurance, you will not be able to get government insurance in 8 years. You're going to pay for it, but you will never benefit.

5.) Doctors will leave general practices for fields of specialty. There is no money in general practice. They already can't afford to take Medicare/Medicaid. No matter what insurance you have, you will have to wait months for an initial diagnosis and only then will you be allowed to see a specialist. God forbid you have cancer.  You have my full sympathy unless you voted for Obama or stayed home. Then I hope you don't ask me to care.

So there it is.  You can make your O faces and scream "Yes We Can" while you whack off to the Dear Leader's picture, or you can prance around with your conspicuously displayed firearms declaring you're gonna take back your country from fucking pussies like McCain.  Meantime, I'm going to sit back and enjoy the ass-pounding you all are going to give each other.

6 comments:

Jammie J. said...

Ugh.

Dick said...

It kinda works me over when you type with vengance on your mind.

Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere said...

Dick was right.

I like it.

charmed said...

I just want some coverage now.  :(

Zelda said...

charmed - who do you want to pay for it?

Dick said...

Charmed, if you're jobless, use Medicaid