Thursday, July 14, 2005

I think there is something wrong with my vibrator. It's starting to make noises like an airplane. Nothing to interrupt a good O like a jet landing on your clit.

Not that that deterred Jethro. An actual jet landing on the bed couldn't deter Jethro.

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I'm just skulking around blogworld today waiting to see if Steve the Sex Addict (and one fastidious bastard) will decide to lick a woman's pussy. My bet is that he will if it means he'll get laid. For all his pretentions, he'd sleep in garbage for a week if he was assured of getting laid by a fairly hot woman every night. If you are a woman on the make, he's the man for you. Just don't fall in love with him. He is my one guilt in blogworld - the source of my biggest hypocrisy. I flamed him once. I'm no pussy, I left my name and blogsite, but I told him what a jerk I thought he was. And now I can't stop reading him. I don't care if he is a jerk. I don't care if he fucks every stupid woman on the planet. I must face facts. I am addicted to the addict.

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UPDATE: Payasita Update: Argument with Chip Pitts of Amnesty International

19 comments:

Nancy said...

Man, I hate loud vibrators . . . I wonder if you google "quiet vibrators" that you can find a better one to buy online. Cuz as much as I love my vibrator, I REALLY hate shopping for them.

Jethro said...

I guess we need to go shopping again.

Cigarette Smoking Man from the X-Files said...

I think the way it works is that if a guy sleeps in garbage for a week, that actually guarantees he will not get laid by any woman remotely hot, while under the olifactory influence of the garbage.

But if that weren't the social barrier it is, most any healthy male with all his parts will do enormously painful, self-degrading, and internationally illegal things in order to even marginally improve their chances of nailing a hottie.

Zelda said...

Nancy - mine wasn't particularly loud until recently. It has since been making a very unpleasant noise. I think I will buy one online next time. I don't particularly care go shopping either.

Jeth - Yeah, huh?

Cig - sounds like quite a dry spell. ;-)

Jethro said...

You don't remember the car ride home from last time? Wasn't that worth the trip out?

Zelda said...

naughty, naughty boy.

Celti said...

I think Steve passed out in the act and she smothered him with that nasty coochie of hers. LOL

Such a shame...he is a guilty pleasure of mine as well.

Kristin said...

Uh helllllllo! Yeah, hi, um, your loyal readers need to hear about the car ride home. It's always a good idea to buy 2 vibes, you know, for a back up. Oh, and extra batteries. So let me guess Steve's not dating Stephanie anymore? That guy irks me and it should be mandatory for him to wear a shirt that reads, "I'll sleep with anything and forget committment."

Inanna said...

Hmmm... Steve is MIA. I agree, he must have fallen face first into Tim's wooo-waahhhhhh and never returned. Sigh. Such an interesting slice of humanity.

Zelda said...

Celti! Long time, girl. And so ew. It would serve him right!

Kristin - Maybe someday. It was hot.

Inanna - STEVE!!!! COME TOWARDS THE LIGHT!!!!

noonie said...

trouble with buying a "silent" one online, is you can't return it if it isn't silent. me speaks from experience.

Brighton said...

Huh, I just get free vibrators from customers. Kidding, sort of.

Inanna said...

LMAO!!!

magikgrl said...

Haha, your addicted to the addict too? Yeah, his blog is a trip, but i love reading it!!

ALa said...

If you go to The Man's site you will find a button for a 10% discount on all the vibrators you could ever want...
...just sayin'.... ;)

Zelda said...

Noonie - sounds like an interesting blog entry.

Brighton - as long as they're still in the package it's alright.

Inanna - PROCTOLOGIST!!!

magik - he is so gross, but I just have to know what juvenile sex antics he engages in next.

ala - I don't think I've ever seen so many reasonably priced dildos.

Evilicious Blonde said...

I have a vibe my other half has nicknamed "The Leafblower".

*snicker*

Definitely time for a new toy.

tescosuicide said...

I refuse to be used as a window to pornographic toys.

alix said...

tesco: HA!