Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Day Two

I hauled a vomiting Jethro out of bed to meet the group Protest Warrior of which I proudly serve as the East Texas Chapter Leader. It is a pro-democracy and freedom advocacy group who fundamentally oppose the left-wing reactionaries. Really cool people. The boys were so hot and there were only a few other girls. If I were single....

Anyway, we all met for brunch and talked politics for about two hours. We were in heaven. Then we all met for paintball, and Jethro ascended to a higher plane. He's really good. Embarrassingly good. All of the others were newbies and Jethro is pretty aggressive. Fortunately it won him respect as opposed to resentment, but he now has 5 massive purple welts all over his body - 2 of which are perilously close to the "facilities."

The field was pretty cool. I would have loved to play, but I don't fancy getting hit anywhere on my precious person by a stinging paintball, so I stayed by the bonfire they had going.The day was beautiful and chilly, but the fire was warm. I sat there and relaxed. Emma fell asleep and Gwennie found a little boy to play with. I just sat there with my eyes closed and waited for Jethro to finish.

Then I said something So Incredibly Stupid.

A man had rolled up to the fire in a wheelchair. He was paralysed from the neck down. Being drowsy and a little hungover, I didn't notice that he couldn't move his hands. I asked him if he was going to play. He looked at me with the sympathy with which you would view a blind person, and politely said his paintball days were over. I contemplated throwing myself on the bonfire.

Night Two

I conned my sisters into staying with the kids again and Jeth and I, once again, headed for 6th. We were supposed to meet the Protest Warriors at a bar called The Gingerman. My sister works at the one in Houston.

It was a great place, and Jeth and I got there first and were able to snag a lounge section. We had just ordered all our beers and were settling in, when someone mentioned that there was an underage member roaming the streets looking for a place that would let him in. Not wanting to leave a fellow member out in the cold, we all left the nice cozy Gingerman for a ghastly dance club that would allow him entrance. I considered calling Trashman to see if he wanted to meet us for a drink, but then I thought how shitty it would be if he left his wife with a sick kid on their honeymoon.

The dance club was amusing. I used to be so intimidated by clubs when I was 18. Now, they bore me to tears. I did get hit on though. That was cool. I had just consumed my 4th or 5th long island iced tea when a guy slid up to me and asked if I was here with anyone. My speech was pretty slurred by this time, so I jerked my thumb towards Jethro and kept drinking. Jethro asked what was up and I said, "He wanted to know if I was here with anyone." The look on the poor guy's face was terrible - a combination of sincerity and fear.

Jethro said, "Were you hitting on my wife?"

The guy said, "No, I wasn't."

Jethro laughed and said, "It's cool."

The guy said, "Thank you."

I chuckled evilly into my long island iced tea.

Yeah. I know. We left the club shortly after.

The last thing I remember is grabbing what I sincerely thought was Jethro's arm. It turned out not to be and I realized that I was fondling the bare arm of Someone Else who, surprisingly didn't pull away. The second I realized it, Jethro grabbed my arm and led me to the bar to pay. I was pretty embarrassed and never got to explain myself to the young man whose arm I'd slobbered over. Nice way for the East Texas Chapter Leader to behave.

We got home, and it was my turn to vomit. We left the next day. I thought I was going to float away on wave after wave of nausea. But I didn't and we're here, and I'm blogging all about the fun we had. I think I want us to move there.

1 comment:

COMMENT THIS said...

On : 12/22/2004 11:22:36 AM Angi (www) said:


Ok, so you want to move to Austin. My favorite sexy star lives there, Matthew McConeghey ( I spelled his name wrong) Ever since he told Rosie ODonnell how to fix a thanksgiving turkey by sticking a budweiser up it opening, I have lusted after that man. If you move to Austin, I will come to see you. Promise.

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On : 12/22/2004 11:55:15 AM Zelda (www) said:


Yeah. I like him too. I think it was after the police were called on him for playing his drums naked in his window. That did it for me. My sister has been his waitress a number of times. She says he's very nice, but he doesn't wear deodorant.

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On : 12/22/2004 2:07:01 PM Jack (www) said:


Austin is many hours from me, but always worth the trip. With a little more notice next time, maybe I can meet yall there. Love the Gingerbreadman, btw, I been there a time or two.

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On : 12/22/2004 3:06:21 PM Kat (www) said:


You know something? You guys are pretty much the coolest couple I've ever known...and I don't even know you yet! We should arrange a night of bar-hopping in some city between all of us.

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On : 12/22/2004 3:28:34 PM Trashman (www) said:


You know if you moved here, we could hang out anytime. Was it wrong for me to laugh when you told the wheelchair story. I think it was a nervous laugh, really.

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On : 12/22/2004 5:43:44 PM Zelda (www) said:


I didn't know you were that far, Jack. But you better make the trip if we ever haul ourselves back up there.

Kat - I think we could say the same about you and Brian if we are ever so fortunate as to meet. Bar-hopping is always a good plan.

Trashman - I know we could. Don't think that isn't an incentive. And no it wasn't wrong of you to laugh, but it was humiliating all the same.

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On : 12/22/2004 9:32:44 PM wilde_thought (www) said:


Is the bar, Talouse Le Treck (sp?), still on 6th street? It shared an open courtyard with another bar. The courtyard had a waterfountain that had fire shooting from its center.

*ENVY*

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On : 12/22/2004 11:30:11 PM Zelda (www) said:


I didn't see it. It could very well be something else now. It was pretty cold when we were there, plus we paid a $7 cover charge for that stupid dance club, so we didn't do much meandering.

And don't be envious. You'll visit again someday. And when you do, let us know.

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On : 12/23/2004 7:51:50 AM Seven (www) said:


sounds like you 2 had quite a fun adventure, except for the retching parts, i hate when that happens!

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On : 12/23/2004 9:16:41 AM Zelda (www) said:


The retching was all part of the experience. I planned for it.

Although, incidentally, there is nothing weirder than planning to vomit.