Friday, January 29, 2010

For Sale: One Asian Doctor Husband. Cheap.

Jethro's killing me.  I suffer from hypochondria.  It's genetic.  So when I become afflicted with an ailment, it is the perfect time to take advantage of me.  Case it point.

I have vertigo.  Right now.  I think it's inner-ear related, but that doesn't mean I couldn't have had some kind of head trauma in my sleep.  Shut up.  So I go to my husband - a doctor - for reassurance.   This is his purpose in life.  He solemnly conducts several tests and then says he's going to test my gag reflex.  I dutifully open my mouth and he unzips his zipper and laughs at me.

And a couple weeks ago, I asked him to work on my arm.  He stood behind me to the right and kept pumping my arm up and down and telling me to relax.  I tried for about 5 minutes before I realized he was rubbing my hand vigorously against his crotch.

He's killing me.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

I'll Spare You Further Sight of the Testicles

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Wednesday, January 20, 2010

(NSFW)Hey Obama


                  OPEN WIDE

Monday, January 18, 2010

Sad Subjects

Jethro posted. It was one of the saddest stories I've ever heard. She had 4 children and three of them were killed in a car accident that occurred because her friend fell asleep at the wheel. Her oldest wasn't in the car.

I don't know what I'd do. I really don't. I'd want to kill myself, but I wouldn't want to leave the surviving child without a mother. It would be easier if everyone was gone just so I could slit my wrists and be done with it. I like to think I'd have the strength to go on, but I really don't think I would if I lost my children. I see every bit of good in the world in them, and if they were gone, there would be nothing. I would be nothing. I love my husband, but our kids are the best thing about us. I can't lose the best thing.

I watched Steve Harrigan break down in Haiti while showing a mom who had lost all 5 of her children in the quake. Usually I'd hold that against a reporter because they need to be brave and get us information. But in his case, I don't blame him much.

Anyway, dreary subject, but it's that kind of day.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Bits 'n' Pieces

I've been forced into a blog update by multiple circumstances. It's okay, but with my schedule, it will take awhile to get my blogroll back and a design that will make me happy.

My husband finally gave in and said we could have a threeway, but now I don't want one anymore.

Here is a song I like:

And finally, Jim Treacher got himself a sweet gig in D.C. at new website launched by Tucker Carlson called The Daily Caller. He's now in charge of that blog, which is known as The DC Trawler. I wonder if he's tired of bow-tie jokes yet? And I wonder if he'll write another review of The Aristocrats? Anyway, it should be enjoyable and I am already enjoying it.

Thursday, January 07, 2010