The Mermaid

OK, I love folk music. Not the hippie tambourine junk, but the folk trios/quartets from the late 50s early sixties. The Limeliters are my favorite. I know. It's probably a gayer genre than the hippie crap. But I like it. It's innocent and comforting. Here's a sample:

Read it through, it's funny. Promise.

When I was a lad in a fishing town
My old man said to me,
"You can live a life, such a jolly life
Sailing on the sea."
You can search the world for pretty girls
'Til your eyes are weak and dim,
But don't go swimming with the Mermaids, Son
If you don't know how to swim.

For their hair is green as seaweed,
And their eyes are pale and blue,
But I'll tell you now before you start,
You may love that girl with all your heart,
You're just gonna love the upper part.
You're not gonna love the tail.

So I signed on to a whaling ship
And my very first day at sea
I seen a mermaid in the waves,
Smiling up at me.
"Come live with me in the sea," said she
"Down on the Ocean floor.
I'll show you a thousand wondrous things
You never seen before."

So in I jumped and she pulled me down
Down to a seaweed bed.
A pillow she made of a tortoise shell
And placed beneath my head.
She served me shrimps and caviar
Upon a silver dish.
She was just my taste right down to the waist
But the rest of her was FISH!

Oh her hair was green as seaweed
And her eyes were pale and blue.
And her face it was a work of art,
But I only gave her half my heart
For though I loved the upper part,
I could not love the TAIL!

So into the tide, I sat and cried
And sang to the clams and whales,
"How I loved her eyes and her seaweed hair,
All but her silvery scales."
Just then her sister swam on by
And set my heart a-whirl!
For her upper part was an ugly fish
But the rest of her was GIRL!

Her toes were round and rosy,
And her knees were thin and pale.
Her legs they were a work of art,
And I loved that girl with all my heart.
I didn't give a damn about the upper part
And that's how I end my tale!