I was watching an E show on Elvis. Just as I was marvelling at how he didn't die of heatstroke while wearing a leather ensemble under blazing hot stage lights, the narrator informed me that "Elvis oozed sex appeal." My scrambled eggs became instantaneously unappetizing.
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Haiku
One of my sisters
Severed ties with her boyfriend
I am quite joyful
For I do not like
Men with stiff, pretentious hair
He was a douchebag
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Sometimes I worry that I will sustain some kind of head trauma and I will lose all perspective and start barking like a dog and demanding that people fuck me. I heard of that happening and it terrifies me. Inhibitions are good.
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