Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Book Review

I haven't posted in a few days because I have been reading the best books.  They are "The Flashman Papers" by George MacDonald Fraser.  Really funny, but not for the faint-of-heart or the politically correct.  They are even funnier if you know your world history (which I could stand to study up on).

In the 1830s, a man named Thomas Hughes wrote a book called "Tom Brown's Schooldays."  It was about life at an all-boy's English boarding school.  Let the homosexual jokes commence.   Anyway, this book is extols the virtues of honesty and condemns the bullying that was so prevalent.  Harry Flashman is the school bully who tortures the younger students, carouses, refuses to study and is eventually expelled for drunkeness.   

"The Flashman Papers" were written in the 1980s and detail the life of Harry Flashman, the bully of "Tom Brown's Schooldays."  Brilliant idea as far as I'm concerned.  Harry Flashman, the school bully, joins the British army and ends up a hero.  It is completely by accident because he is an absolute coward and a cad and an obsequious brown-noser.  The history is pretty accurate and they are great reads.  I just finished the second in the series, where Flashman becomes embroiled in an international plot to steal the identity of a Count.  He ends up impersonating the Count, and despite already having a wife, marries the Count's betrothed, the Duchess Irma.  After drinking heavily with the men downstairs, Flashman decides to devirginize the bride.  I'll quote an exerpt from the wedding night passage:

"Cheer up little wife,"says I (Flashman), "there won't be any more singing downstairs," and I stooped and whipped the nightdress clean off, over her head.  She gave a little cry, and since I maintain that the best way to deal with nervous females is to treat 'em hearty, I lifted her up bodily, popped her on, and stumped around the room singing:  "This is the way the ladies ride, trit-trot, trit-trot, trit-trot."

This pretty much embodies the character, except for the extreme cowardice.  Anyway, they're really funny books, and I highly recommend them.

New Topic:  I quit my job about once every two weeks.  Something will frustrate me, and I will announce, dramatically, that I quit.  I will stalk out of the house, slam the door and call Jethro.  He'll calm me down, and I'll go back to work.  The downside to this is that, "I quit" no longer has the same effect it once did.

I don't hate my job.  I actually like it quite a bit.  I absolutely DO NOT like working in the same house as my family resides.  My sisters are obnoxious and bitchy and spoiled, and my mom only responds to extreme verbal abuse whether it is from her husband (my stepdad and boss) or kids.  I claim no virtue in the verbal abuse department.  I was Hell's own bitch to my mom when I was in high school and college.  I'm sorry for it now, and we get along much better, but she always manages to take the side of my beastly sisters.  God, grant me the patience to deal with these idiots until Jeth finishes school and we can move away from this steaming hell hole of a city.  PMS.  Sorry.


Angi said...

The books sound hilarious.

Good luck with the family. You are a braver woman than I, no way I could work with my family.

jp said...

You had about 5 words in this post that I don't know the meaning of. ;o)

Zelda said...

Angi- Thanks.

JP- 5 words that you understood or didn't understand? I can get school-teacherish if I'm talking or writing about books. Bad habit left over from college. Sorry.

jp said...

I head exploded after reading them. :o)

Greg said...

What do you do?

Zelda said...

I manage my stepdad's real estate office out of his house. I majored in Lit in college, but I never graduated. All I got for my money was a vocabulary :-)

Inanna said...

I bow down to thee great Zelda for I would surely be in jail or permanently unemployed and drooling if I had to work with my family for any length of time. To me, a phone call is too long.

Anonymous said...
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Zelda said...

You are right Inanna, but I need the flexibility. More's the pity.