Friday, January 18, 2008


I was listening to one of the artistically gifted, but intellectually bereft (or AGIBs for short) tell a story about a near escape he had with members of law enforcement. At first I thought it was a story about an apartment dog, which turned out not to be the case. But that was the only reason I began listening. I'd never heard anyone refer to a dog who lived in an apartment as an "apartment dog." The entire story was liberally peppered with both "dog" and "fool," including this gem of a sentence, "Yeah and my girl she was pissed off, dog cuz I was supposed be in court the next day, fool."

I guess it was better than "like" and "whatever."

And I was right. They are all high. When we have our breaks, if they're not in the parking lot smoking weed, they're dipping. One of my classmates told me about the massive bloody nose he experienced after snorting some coke while suffering a sinus infection. I try to keep my angelic face on so I won't be forced to say something like, "No, man. Pot makes me sleepy." Or some other witty excuse from my unused '80s repertoire.

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