Monday, January 17, 2005

Whoop that 'gator, Ma!

I seem to have caught the hanta virus from Tinyhands, so I'm not really up to scratch (not that I ever am). So I'm sitting here with tissues in both nostrils because I've lost miles of nasal epidermis from wiping it.

I was going to write a funny Rome story where the uncouth Americans stick it to the intellectually superior, yet strangely inbred Europeans, but it demands more concentration than I have to give.

So instead I'll tell you about taking Emma and Gwennie on a trip to the Houston downtown Aquarium. The kids loved it. My mom and stepdad, and 4 sisters came also. The downtown Aquarium is a combination restaurant/lounge/carnival/aquarium. The restaurant is centered around the largest aquarium in North America, and they have stuffed their tanks with all manner of large and intimidating fish.

The carnival is mostly kiddie rides. They had a train that went around the seven acres and into a shark exhibit. Very boring. They talked all about how sharks were endangered, blah, blah, yawn, yawn, and how Jaws and scary movies had contributed to their demise....yawn, blah. They than proceed to tell us that a Great White Shark has escaped into Buffalo Bayou and to be on the lookout. Anyone with three brain cells knows what's coming. We pass over a small pond with a huge white mass quavering under the water. Out pops the animatronic Great White Shark and scares the bejeezus out of everyone 2 and under. The animatronic shark was gigantic and if it had been loose (and alive) in Buffalo Bayou (yes, I am aware that sharks live in salt water), someone would have shot it. So you can drone on and on about sharks being an endangered species but in the end, everyone reverts to survival instinct and there is nothing you can do except piss on the hypocrisy of the downtown Aquarium.

That being said, it was still a fun day for the kids. We all rode on the carousel which had various aquatic creatures instead of the usual horses. My mom rode an alligator, and being sometimes a silly lady, she began to whip it, hence the title of this post which I have always wanted to say out loud, but never had a reason.

They had a white tiger exhibit was cool too until I realized jealously that the tigers had a larger cage than I did house and it was cleaner. Poo on them.

That's it. I'm off to find something more absorbent to staunch the rivulets of fluid streaming from my nasal passages.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Whoop that 'gator, Ma!

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On : 1/17/2005 4:43:51 PM Angi (www) said:


The things we (yawn) endure just in the name of being good parents. At least your mom was having fun.

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On : 1/18/2005 8:01:21 AM Fleece (www) said:


Ah, the stupid "GAH!" shark scaring trick. I hate that. (and only because I'd get scared...yes, I only have two brain cells)

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On : 1/18/2005 9:42:34 AM Zelda (www) said:


I admit I jumped a little even though I knew it was coming, but it didn't scare the bejeezus out of me.