Monday, February 27, 2006

The Tale of Two Bad Children

No one can take the wind out of my sails like Gwendolyn. No one, bar none.

We were at Target yesterday and there was a young man working there who had a skin condition where some pigment was missing from his arms and face. Emma pointed her finger at him and started asking what was wrong with him. I slapped her arm down and hurried away before he could see how rude my children were. I delivered a stern lecture to both of them on how it wasn't nice to point at people no matter what and how it could hurt their feelings and it is a terrible thing to hurt someone's feelings.

I was just gearing up for good long rant, when Gwennie, lying lazily in the grocery cart like the Queen of Sheba on a litter with her arms crossed behind her head, interrupted me.

"He must be moulting" She said casually.

I had no words because I couldn't breathe for laughing. I'm starting to seriously question whether it is possible for me to raise nice children. I'm one of those horrid parents who can't help laughing even when their kids do something dreadful. But I try. Really. I do.


Only $19.95 said...

That's hilarious! I laughed out loud reading it; it must have been beyond amazing hearing it....

Karyzma said...

wow...I just let out a pretty hearty chuckle myself. That's great, Zelda.

Liz said...

Too funny!

My child greeted my husband upon his return from work with a fancy barrette in her hair. His comment, "Aren't you stylish?!"'

And hour later as she is refusing her dinner, he gets a bit stern with her and she retorts, "But I'm *stylish*!"

She's not quite four.


Madzillah said...

Curiosity is not bad. Asking isn't either. It's just FREAKING MORTIFYING to the parents.

My mom STILL tells of my exclamation when I saw my first "little person": "Look mama, it's little miss muffet!"

Have fun with YOUR scientists!

Zelda said...

The boys are all looking at me funny because I keep saying "moulting" out loud and laughing hysterically.

I needed that, tell Gwennie to keep it up.
Angi | Homepage | 02.27.06 - 5:15 pm | #


I'm sure it will be even more fun when they are old enough to figure out how to dissipate mom's anger....just make her laugh by telling her one of their snide little thoughts.

Moulting....the first thing that came to mind when you said that was Gilbert Godfried as the cartoon Iago: "Look at this. I'm so upset that I'm moulting."
Sam | Homepage | 02.27.06 - 6:22 pm | #


I will get onto Braden and he will give me that look and if that wasnt enough he then says "Mom you cant punish me this is my best puppy dog look".
Kel | Homepage | 02.27.06 - 6:28 pm | #


You're no different than any other parent. You've got observant and smart kids, that's a deadly combo.
Kristin | 02.27.06 - 7:42 pm | #


Oh, shit. I think that's hilarious! And its not like they did it to be purposefully cruel, they were just curious, as kids are.
Inanna | Homepage | 02.27.06 - 8:11 pm | #


You can't be too mad at them because you KNOW where they get that devilish sense of humor from!
Jen | Homepage | 02.27.06 - 10:43 pm | #


Let em point, it makes for killer blog fodder.
dick | Homepage | 02.28.06 - 10:58 am | #


"like the Queen of Sheba on a litter with her arms crossed behind her head" LMFAO. Great one. I know it's a dilemma, but that's one of those posts that gives me kid envy. You are blessed.
phlegmfatale | Homepage | 03.01.06 - 12:27 am | #


OMG, that wold have rendered me speechless as well! What are you doing to those girls? LOL
Berry | Homepage | 03.02.06 - 9:53 pm | #