Monday, February 20, 2006

We had a lovely time with Travis and Brighton at Alexander the Great Greek Restaurant. The only thing that marred it was the traffic. I'd forgotten it was All-Star weekend and Houston was priveledged to host the event and suck worthless celebrity ass all weekend. Poor Brighton and Travis, is all I can say.

I had the most obnoxious Friday. It was so bad that when I tried to blog about it, all that would come out was deep, profound, exorcist-style profanity. But a pleasant weekend puts enough distance for me to see the twisted humor in the situation.

One of our listings is a little lease property. The owner (Californian) is not the easiest client in the world, but she is still a nice lady and has never been rude. However, she likes to do things her own way without taking anyone's advice. She is also indecisive. This translates into feeding her ideas while at the same time making her think she is the one who had them. For instance, and this will be important later, she set the security deposit for $700.00. Usually the security deposit is equal to one month's rent, which, in this case was $875.00. Her reasoning was that the lower price would attract more rentors to the property. If I had been the one going over the lease, I would have said to just keep it at $875.00. But for some reason, stepfather didn't push the issue.

Anyway, it's a cute house, we haven't had it on the market too long, and we expected it to rent out fairly quickly, so it was no surprise when a young man called me about it.

He was pleasant enough on the phone and seemed to really like the home. He asked me to send him a rental application, which I did along with the required Information About Brokerage Services, which basically explains what the real estate agents' roles are in the transaction.

This gave him some consternation as he thought he was going to have to pay our fee. I explained to him that we were the Owner's agent and she would be paying our fee which was the equivalent of the security deposit. In retrospect, I should have told him that the fee was the equivalent of one month's rent, but I wasn't aware at the time that the security deposit was lower. It didn't matter though, because he wasn't the one responsible for paying it regardless. He asked if he needed his own agent, and I said that would be fine, but the terms of the lease were pretty straightforward. (I had no interest in bringing another realtor into the transaction after I had done all the work, but if he wanted one, there is nothing I could or would do to stop him). I asked if he had any more questions about the fees, and he said no. Not five minutes later, I got a call from his father asking me to explain about the fees again.

This should have been a bright red flag with a singing asshole on it. Any man, 18+ who need their daddy to call and figure things out for them is a wuss and is not to be trusted. In my opinion.

He didn't fax in the offer, but did continue to pester me throughout the day to explain things to him. The next day, we received another offer. His came in a short time later. He had decided to use his own agent. Both offers listed the security deposit as $700.00 and that is when I became aware that they security deposits was not the same amount as one month's rent. No matter.

The first offer to come in was from three young men. Stereotypically, they're not the best tenants in the world, but they all seemed to have stable jobs and they wanted to move in on the first of March. Daddy's Boy was a better bet since he was older, had been employed longer, and had kids. The only problem was that he wanted to move on the first of April.

After discussing it many times with the indecisive CA woman, and subtly pointing out that her thought that an older father of two was probably more stable than three young bachelors, she said that she would lease to him on the first of April, even though she would lose a whole month's rent, if he paid $875.00 for the security deposit instead of $700.00, a difference of $175.00.

I called Daddy's Boy's realtor and told her we had in another offer and these were the terms under which her client could lease the property. She said she would talk to her client, and not five minutes later, I got a call from him damning me up and down for trying to get him to pay the realtors' fees. *Sigh* I hung up the phone on him just as he was gearing up for a good rant. I don't get paid to listen to a Daddy's Boy bust a nut-let.

So if you have managed to read this far, let me ask you. Is it just me or are men becoming more feminized? And if so, is this really a good thing?

Granted I can be a little tomboyish, but I should not be more manly than men. Really.


phlegmfatale said...

It's amazing how alike we think, sometimes. Reading the first paragraph about the guy calling his daddy, I kept thinking "How unmanly!" And people act like the security deposit to protect the property owner is someone trying to rob them, for heaven's sake. It's ok that they have free reign over say a $100,000 piece of someone else's property, but they want to quibble over $175. Give me a fucking break! Sympathies, hon.

Anonymous said...

hi there, im david usa/singapore. im working as agent here and we are allowed to collect one month from owner and half month from tenant and also collect when there is a renewal on the lease....but..when it comes to sales we get screwed big time! only 2% on the first mil and then 1% after that. average sale is from 500k to 1mil. u guys in usa are 6% right?
keep on trucking!

Zelda said...

I dont think he sounded that much better than the 3 single guys since he had to have his daddy call. So did the 3 guys get the house?
Kel | Homepage | 02.20.06 - 7:40 pm | #


Yep. I was getting a pedicure Saturday and there was a guy and his wife or girlfriend next to me getting them too. What happened to a man going to their barber Sal for a little off the top? I sat there all weirded out that afternoon. That ain't right. Oh and hello, if you make babies, grow some nuts and learn to read and interpret lease documents for the love of GOD! Oh and dad, cut the apron strings already.
Kristin | 02.20.06 - 8:20 pm | #


I agree....our world has feminized men. Just lends more credibility to one of my favorite books, "Wild At Heart".

By the way..."bust a nut-let"....LOL. That's awesome.
Sam | Homepage | 02.20.06 - 9:31 pm | #


So this guy was only 18 and was the father of two children already - did I read this right? And he still needs to call in his father to interpret a simple lease agreement?

Sad, it really is the father's fault. If he had raised his son over the past 18 years to make good decisions, he would be ready for the real world. I signed my first lease at the age of 17. I did not need my mommy and daddy's help. I did not need their advice, their money for the downpayment, or for them to move my stuff in for me. I was taught independence and how to be self-sufficient.
Jen | Homepage | 02.20.06 - 10:35 pm | #


Kel - He was an asshole and he had a wimpy little voice. And yeah, the three guys did get the lease.

Kristin - I'm hoping that was an umbilical cord and not, well...

Sam - You're a dude after my own heart.

Jen - The guy was in his 30s. I was referring to any self-respecting man 18 or older...
Zelda | Homepage | 02.20.06 - 11:39 pm | #


He has two children and had to call his Daddy TO RENT A HOUSE? I didn't even call my daddy when I BOUGHT my house. Yeah, men need to stop being metrosexuals and start being neanderthals again, sorta.
Inanna | Homepage | 02.21.06 - 11:39 am | #


Ok, all I got out of this was $875 FOR THE RENTAL OF A HOUSE! I shit you not, I was paying that nearly 10 years ago for a one-bedroom in Laguna Beach and have been paying twice that for the rental we stayed in until our house was done. I should have moved to Texas long ago
Gooch | Homepage | 02.21.06 - 12:04 pm | #


Inanna - Give me a neanderthal who doesn't bitch about the house and I'm cool.

Gooch - Rental prices are all over the place out here. If you want to live closer in it would be very easy to find a shitty little apt for that amount, if not higher. It all depends. But yeah, in general, home prices are much better. The downside is property taxes which are as high as 3.9% in some areas. Ridiculous in my opinion.
Zelda | Homepage | 02.21.06 - 12:22 pm | #


Unfortunately, not all, but most men have turned into little pussies. There are very few real ones left.
The good news is that I have a ball kicking them around and listening to them cry like the little bitches they are.
dick | Homepage | 02.21.06 - 12:45 pm | #


while I agree with the statement that most men have become very feminized (our whole society has really), I must say I know few men or women of any age that seem able to read any sort of legal document and understand it
Mordineus | 02.21.06 - 8:33 pm | #


I agree with you about men becoming feminized. It sickens me. Men should be men and women should raise babies. LOL Gotta go I'm late for my spa treatment.
Trashman | Homepage | 02.22.06 - 1:28 am | #


He was probably just upset that the woman doing his pedicure used the wrong colour polish. Men, geesh.
And we had SO much FUN Saturday night, traffic and all!!
Brighton | Homepage | 02.22.06 - 8:07 am | #


(oops, I originally posted this in the wrong place)

It's amazing how alike we think, sometimes. Reading the first paragraph about the guy calling his daddy, I kept thinking "How unmanly!" And people act like the security deposit to protect the property owner is someone trying to rob them, for heaven's sake. It's ok that they have free reign over say a $100,000 piece of someone else's property, but they want to quibble over $175. Give me a fucking break! Sympathies, hon.
phlegmfatale | Homepage | 02.23.06 - 8:12 pm | #


Thanks phlegmmy. The man-child definitely had some problems and if $175 was going to send him into a downward spiral of psychosis, then I'm very happy our client did not lease her home to him.
Zelda | Homepage | 02.24.06 - 12:52 am | #