Thursday, March 23, 2006

Alright. I admit it. I succumbed. Two posts in a row mentioning (if not featuring) defecation. I never thought my boundaries would stretch so far, but apparently my hypocrisy has limits and my blog has none. Let's play a drinking game. For every Tombstone reference, however subtle, drink.
So is everyone all ready for Blogmeet 2006? I am. It's on my 30th birthday, so I'm hoping I will be too distracted by all the wild partying to feel the sting.
I'm going on a diet too, or as they say, I'm changing my lifestyle patterns to incorporate food in a healthy way. And you have to move your forearms and hands in a circle, outward from your chest when you say "healthy."

I think I will start posting the ridiculous amount of food I eat per day. Then you people need to start saying things like, "You need a forklift for those mashed potatoes?" and "Poor fucking Jethro, trying to tap that ass." Perhaps some light degradation will inspire willpower. Nothing else seems to be working. But I can't start until the evening. It's after 6:00 pm that it all breaks down. It is 4:00 pm and all I've had today has been a forkful of scrambled eggs from Emma's plate. But come suppertime, it's "roll out the dumptrucks, mama's gettin' her feed on." And the frenzy doesn't stop until midnight.

1 comment:

Zelda said...

I love any references to Tombstone!!! In fact while I was reading and before you even said something about it I was going to put it in my comment!

I know I'm not going to be the only one to say that I can't imagine that you need to lose anything! And I can't imagine Jethro having problems "tapping that ass" either Good luck though with the whole changing your eating lifestyle sucky kind of stuff! LOL
Michelle | Homepage | 03.23.06 - 7:12 pm | #


I was thinking about doing the Blogmeet 2006. But then I realized I would have to travel. (sigh)

You know, they're having a fish convention in Chicago, too, in a couple months. The joy! And then realizing that if I wanted to do that, I'd have to travel.

Why do all the good things happen in other states? *grumble*
Jeanette | Homepage | 03.23.06 - 10:26 pm | #


Can. No. Wait! This is going to be the party of the block!
Kristin | 03.23.06 - 11:07 pm | #


I wanna be there!!! Maybe if I get my bead order in, I can raise the money!!

As for stretching your limits, should that be said in the presence of your anus?

Diet tip: Eat small healthy meals ALL DAY!! If you wait until you're starving, you'll do what I do, and eat until your eyes cross and I don't have anyone tapping my ass.
Inanna | Homepage | 03.24.06 - 12:51 am | #


Michelle - You're too nice. You're not helping.

Jeanette - Suck it up, woman and come on out! Trashman might be there.

Kristin - I'm dying to meet you at last.

Nanner - You caught my double meaning. Good for you. And I would love to eat small healthy meals throughout the day, but I love eating big unhealthy meals throughout the day even more. :-(
Zelda | Homepage | 03.24.06 - 1:29 am | #


Strap a string bikini to the fridge. That always works for me.
dick | Homepage | 03.24.06 - 9:50 am | #


Unfortunately dick, I can't wear a string bikini no matter how much weight I lose. The girls will rebel and spring forth in a most unflattering way.
Zelda | Homepage | 03.24.06 - 11:37 am | #


When/where is blogmeet'06?

I didn't catch any tombstone reference. then again, i'm drugged up and dazed and caught little of your post.
tCj | Homepage | 03.24.06 - 4:01 pm | #