Friday, May 26, 2006

Conversation With An Elemplary Learning Center Representative

Rita: "Exemplary Learning Center, this is Rita speaking."

Zelda: "Hi, my name is Zelda and I have two daughters that I am thinking about putting in summer classes."

Rita: "Have they had problems in school?"

Zelda: "Not really, but I want them to get a little jump start on the next year. I don't think they are realizing their full potential. My younger one is about to start Kindergarten and she is kind of shy and I think her speech may be a little slow. I'm not really sure about her. She is hard to figure out. The older one is doing okay, but I think she needs to work on her math skills."

Rita: "Well it's good you're getting ahead of any potential difficulties. I'm just going to ask you a few questions about them individually."

A series of questions ensue about both girls that are interspersed with my own unintelligible brand of humor.

Zelda: "As far as Gwendolyn is concerned, I really want her to get ahead in Math. Math is my Waterloo and I'm borderline retarded."

Rita: "Oh my god! I never would have guessed!"

Zelda: "Well, uhhh...I meant I'm just uhhh...borderline retarded at uhhh...Math, not uhhh...really borderline uhhh...

Nevermind. I am retarded."


Greg said...

Thx for the laugh today.


Seeker said...

I guess I am a bit re-re because I have no idea what "Elemplary"[Sic] is..


Zelda said...

Matthew Hardman - Glad you could take the time from jerking off and screaming at yourself in the mirror to come here and tell me you think this web is crap. You must be very disappointed in your computer purchase.