Rodeo Sex

Forgive me if you have heard of this before. It was new to me and I heard several variations in one night. This was the best.

1st Guy: You ever had rodeo sex?
2nd Guy: What's rodeo sex?
1st Guy: When you're doing a girl from behind, grab her by the hair and whisper in her ear, "You are so fucking ugly," and see how long you can hold on.

Aside from being a little nauseating, it was hysterical. None of the girls I was with had heard the joke. Every guy had his own personal variation.

It constantly amazes me how guys keep up with stuff like that. I consider myself pretty aware of slang, dirty jokes, etc. - at least on par with Jethro. I figured that after 5 years of marriage, and with the amount of "sharing " that we do, we would at least be on the same page. Not so. Someone had emailed me a dirty picture of a drunk woman, legs spread, without panties, sitting between two men in a golf cart. I forgot what the point of this was, but the caption referred to her "bacon strip." I know. Ew. Anyway, as an experiment, I asked Jethro (who was in the next room) what "bacon strip" meant. He walked into the room, grinning. He didn't even have to see the picture to know exactly what I was talking about.

I really believed that I thought about sex as much as a guy. I don't think that is true, and if it isn't, it is scary since I think about sex constantly.

Ah well. There is no point to this at all.

New Topic:

Jethro is ill. He thinks he has an ulcer. His stomach really bothers him after he eats and when the girls come into the room. Just the sight of them makes his stress level elevate and this translates into crippling stomach pain

Now, I don't want to seem insensitive to Jethro's pain, because I know he is hurting, but I'm horny. I think he could work through the pain and do it anyway, but I'm not that insensitive. However, if this keeps up, I will start to get a little desperate. I already had an erotic dream last night. I can't remember what it was, but I woke up happy. I wish I could remember.

If this goes on much longer, I will have to get myself a new boy. I'm not working to put a man through school and then be denied my justly deserved sexual gratification. I only married him for the sex (and vice versa).